So, here I am a Saturday morning sipping on my Latte in a small café in Dundee, Scotland. Trying to make up of "how I got here"- what "happened these last months" and somehow realise
what I feel about it:
So fast tracking back to June and to when I was in a totally different headspace, location and routines. Finishing up and preparing in all that it means with shows and performances and assesments towards my bachelor graduation. No time to think, but to do. Trying to catch everything and appreciate it in all that also culminates in a wave of enevitable fatigue.
Fatigue in terms of looking back and realising all the hours, days, thoughts you have dedicated to arrive to THIS moment. But also a proud feeling that makes you straighten your back in pure enjoyment over what you have overcome and achieved.
I have to send a thought to young Matilda. How her dream was to dance professionally. And even though I am under the term "Apprentice Dancer" and are studying a Masters, I am still in Scottish Dance Theatre and are practically doing everything as the hired dancers are doing.
Now I have just finished a week here. Recapping repetoire, morning classes, rehearsals of remaking of a piece: preparing for performing at Edingburgh Fringe. Maybe it is the release of endorfins that comes from have been at The Physio right before this, but I feel calm, content and excited for the future. I feel like the future will solve itself as it is suppose to.
As cheesy and cliche as this small rant have been, I think this look back is vital to share; that you can achieve and accomplish wonderful things. And to remind yourself of that your everyday right now is where you dreamed of being.
"Våga Chansa" as one of my favourite tunes preaches. Therefore I can now shout proudly, I DID, and I STILL DO.
to follow my journey in pictures and videos: @matildabjarum on instagram.